Idk what it is about masculinity that loves submissive women
That’s insecure masculinity. Men who are secure don’t need a woman to be submissive. She will be with him by her own volition because she feels safe with him.
There’s a difference between submissiveness in sex scenarios and submissiveness in the rest of life, though. I don’t think wanting the former means somebody has toxic masculinity.
So from my perspective, the ‘submissive lady’ part is really only like a mental pleasure. An independent or powerful woman who herself chooses to submit to you temporarily is like the hottest goddamn thing I can think of.
Otherwise? Yeah, I also want her to feel like she’s in control of what and when she wants things.
It can’t be like total submission over everything. Otherwise it’s meaningless. Like I don’t want to always decide what to do for dinner. I don’t like writing all the checks. I like to cook, and I have specific ways I clean. I’m also not a mental health professional, but I’ll listen.
A woman who can take care of herself and play helpless is my absolute dream. Women who are helpless are a lot of work and it was not worth everything I had to fucking put up with while being told I was absolute shit for not doing enough bleh
I’m too high to go on a rant about the feminist theory relating to bdsm, but I know plenty of militantly feminist male doms that prefer submissive women as partners. It’s when a guy associates his masculinity and his dom identity that you start seeing a lot of misogyny.
I think that the important thing to remember is that just because something gets you off, that doesn’t mean it’s a good way to run the world.
A feminist Dom makes sense to me, they are getting off on the control but only with someone who enjoys it, think lots of those guys get off even more on seeing what it’s doing for their sub.
Maybe some guys are just more confident in themselves and desire a bit of a challenge… The more outgoing and assured a woman is about their own desires, the better they are in the bedroom, at least for those that can deal with a woman’s needs instead of only thinking of their own pathetic self.
Don’t get me wrong, there’s a place for many ways in the spectrum of stronger vs subdued, but the best is when regardless of the play outside the bedroom they can be clear about what they need and want once inside.
A very astute observation from the author Heinlein:
“Darling, a true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires.”
I’m not super happy about connotations of some of the words but for it’s time written, the summation of “fuck what society thinks and absolutely do anything you desire” holds great value.
She doesn’t have to be a Dom to be clear about her needs. Strong confidence just means she knows her weapon and can bring a bit of a rumble to the tumble.
Dudes who are afraid of strong chicks need to go jerk off in their overbuilt bullshit trucks and stop harassing women and trying to convince everyone their dicks aren’t 3".
Take some fucking Viagra or something if you can’t keep it up when a woman talks.
Idk what it is about masculinity that loves submissive women but tbh to me as a dude whose pretty switch it’s a weird red flag.
Like a teenager wanting to be a cop.
It is so fucking hot when a girl grabs my junk when I didn’t expect it (when we’re an item and it’s clearly consensual). Or something.
Idk.
Maybe I’m queer 🕺
Fellas, is it gay to want a woman that wants you?
That’s insecure masculinity. Men who are secure don’t need a woman to be submissive. She will be with him by her own volition because she feels safe with him.
Yes it is gay. Women think about men. And thinking about men is gay.
There’s a difference between submissiveness in sex scenarios and submissiveness in the rest of life, though. I don’t think wanting the former means somebody has toxic masculinity.
The weirdo asian fetish guys are the worst.
Im a white guy and my wife just happens to be asian and they think that’s a pass to talk to me about how great submissive asian women are.
My wife is not even remotely submissive, she’s one of the strongest people I know and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Strong, capable women are so much more interesting than this fetish idea of an opinion-less submissive sex slave.
-Mary Wollstonecraft
So from my perspective, the ‘submissive lady’ part is really only like a mental pleasure. An independent or powerful woman who herself chooses to submit to you temporarily is like the hottest goddamn thing I can think of.
Otherwise? Yeah, I also want her to feel like she’s in control of what and when she wants things.
It can’t be like total submission over everything. Otherwise it’s meaningless. Like I don’t want to always decide what to do for dinner. I don’t like writing all the checks. I like to cook, and I have specific ways I clean. I’m also not a mental health professional, but I’ll listen.
A woman who can take care of herself and play helpless is my absolute dream. Women who are helpless are a lot of work and it was not worth everything I had to fucking put up with while being told I was absolute shit for not doing enough bleh
I’m too high to go on a rant about the feminist theory relating to bdsm, but I know plenty of militantly feminist male doms that prefer submissive women as partners. It’s when a guy associates his masculinity and his dom identity that you start seeing a lot of misogyny.
I think that the important thing to remember is that just because something gets you off, that doesn’t mean it’s a good way to run the world.
A feminist Dom makes sense to me, they are getting off on the control but only with someone who enjoys it, think lots of those guys get off even more on seeing what it’s doing for their sub.
Here is an excellent book on the topic if you’re interested.
Maybe some guys are just more confident in themselves and desire a bit of a challenge… The more outgoing and assured a woman is about their own desires, the better they are in the bedroom, at least for those that can deal with a woman’s needs instead of only thinking of their own pathetic self.
Don’t get me wrong, there’s a place for many ways in the spectrum of stronger vs subdued, but the best is when regardless of the play outside the bedroom they can be clear about what they need and want once inside.
A very astute observation from the author Heinlein:
“Darling, a true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires.”
I’m not super happy about connotations of some of the words but for it’s time written, the summation of “fuck what society thinks and absolutely do anything you desire” holds great value.
She doesn’t have to be a Dom to be clear about her needs. Strong confidence just means she knows her weapon and can bring a bit of a rumble to the tumble.
Dudes who are afraid of strong chicks need to go jerk off in their overbuilt bullshit trucks and stop harassing women and trying to convince everyone their dicks aren’t 3".
Take some fucking Viagra or something if you can’t keep it up when a woman talks.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=LSGOSOqaRZc