• apotheotic (she/her)
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      1104 months ago

      Fae: GIVE ME YOUR FIRST BORN

      Human, having unprotected sex with their gay partner for the 7th time that day: I’M TRYING

      • The Snark Urge
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        1044 months ago

        Oh that’s easy, they secretly hook you up with someone really perfect for you, you have a great kid, and then the love of your life has a stroke and their personality does a 180°, tearing your whole dream family apart as the fey returns and offers to let you keep just one family member, and then you fail to realize the deal includes yourself and you’ve unwittingly sacrificed all your cognitive abilities and memories while your daughter’s life gets ruined as she spends her best years taking care of her madman father with no hope for a better life.