In case it’s not painfully obvious, this is a parody account.

  • TWeaK
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    231 year ago

    I had mumps when I was 27. Somehow I was too early for the UK vaccine, but too late for the US vaccine. When I had it, my neck swelled up so I had no chin. I remember being in agony, walking downstairs in the morning to limp around, then going upstairs to the toilet. When I got up there I would see myself in the mirror and say “ribbit” and laugh at my neck. Which itself caused agony.

    All because a fellow student from South Africa hadn’t been vaccinated, caught it, and spread it to me.

    I haven’t since impregnated a girl, so I guess I got that going for me.

    • @Duranie@lemmy.film
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      21 year ago

      I worked with someone years ago that had it twice as a kid. Bio kids are off the table for him.

      I wish to offer eloquently worded condolences or congratulations in regards to the potential long term effects in accordance with your desires, but I’m fighting a losing battle with words here. I think you get the idea though.