As I’ve gained more and more close friends, more than I’ve ever had in my life, and some closer than I’ve ever had in my life, I’ve come to realize something recently. Despite the prevailing feeling like I want a relationship, I don’t actually know why it is I want one, nor what I have to gain from one.

Many of my friends nowadays are in fact either people who have rejected me romantically, or are exs that things just didn’t work out with but we found we made better friends. And that’s been the case with getting rejected too. I just end up enjoying the friendship so much, and getting so much out of it, that I just start to wonder why I ever wanted anything more than that. And what even is more than that?

Maybe everybody else has already realized this by my age, and my sheltered religious upbringing has just held me back a few years again, but I’ve started seriously considering, with every new crush, if they’d actually be any better for me as a partner instead of just a friend, and I’ve found that the answer, thus far, has always been no.

I guess the only thing that still has me wondering is, well, what does a romantic relationship offer that friendship doesn’t? My friends already love me, and tell me all the time. They already care for me in ways I used to think only a partner would, and I do my best to care for them too. I still desire a romantic relationship for some reason, but I just can’t see what there is to gain anymore.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 ℹ️
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    7 months ago

    I’m aromantic so I have pretty clear reasons why I want a relationship.

    • A partner in crime so to speak; someone who has my back always. Morally, emotionally, physically, etc. I can’t do everything on my own and having a person who is always available and willing to help close to me is important.
    • Cuddles
    • Sex

    What the hell even is romance?

    • @jarfil@beehaw.org
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      7 months ago

      Romance is basically your first point, when done with someone you like and are willing to offer them the same in return 😉

    • @Sombyr@lemmy.zipOP
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      27 months ago

      I’m beginning to wonder what romance is as well, after gaining close friends, especially one very close friend, who considers everything I once considered romantic to be just friendly interaction. That was kinda the catalyst for me to start wondering what it is a relationship can even offer me if I can have friends like this anyway.