• @[email protected]
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      397 months ago

      People in the real world like to rub their parts together and don’t concern themselves with these labels.

      Yes these labels are meaningful and can help you define who you are and what you want but don’t let them get in the way of finding someone who wants to consensually rub parts. It’s really just an Internet thing and niche sex culture.

      • @[email protected]
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        27 months ago

        “it’s really just an internet thing” is just completely wrong.

        If I’m a top and am not comfortable bottoming, then no matter how attractive the guy I’m not going to want to get with another top (yes, I’m aware of frotting and giving head, but sometimes you want penetrative sex yk). So I put that on my profile, to help ensure I match with someone I’m going to be sexually compatible with.

        Beyond preventing wasting time, it also helps give clear boundaries and ensure that hookups are safer for both involved.

    • @[email protected]
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      7 months ago

      It’s often the most common combination. In the real world, most people have preferences, but an openness to changing things up whenever they and their partner(s) feel like it. This need to label yourself and box yourself into specific slots is mostly a product of internet subcultures where finding your hyperspecific identity card becomes a fixation in and of itself. It’s the sort thing that comes out of knowledge without practical experience, if you catch my drift. Like fantasizing about what kind of chess player you would be without ever actually playing chess. Once you actually get out there and meet people like yourself (which, sadly, for many people is far easier said than done), you generally tend to broaden your sense of yourself and what you like or don’t like quite dramatically. And to be fair, sometimes it’s the other way round; you try everything and find out that are only a few bits you really like. But either way a willingness to be flexible is a really good starting point.

    • @[email protected]
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      27 months ago

      yes. although you’re more likely to see them separately. I rarely see vers on Fet or switch on grindr